


Blow my Brains Out and my Mind

by orphan_account



Category: Family Guy (Cartoon)
Genre: Childbirth, Consensual, Dating, Discussion of Abortion, Gay, Gay Sex, M/M, Mpreg, Suicide Attempt, Suicide Notes, Underage Sex, Unplanned Pregnancy
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-11-02
Updated: 2020-08-01
Packaged: 2021-01-16 22:23:06
Rating: Mature
Warnings: Underage
Chapters: 12
Words: 4,116
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/21278693
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/orphan_account/pseuds/orphan_account
Summary: Brian is ready to kill himself. He's given up on trying to find a love interest or even a friend. His novel is a complete bust, too.Suicide seems like the only option for the white dog, until Stewie offers him something better.





	1. Brian's Suicide

What a meaningless being he was. He was only an average writer, no-one special or famous. He was only moderate when it came to sex, barely to be remembered. He was a failure at love, could never hold a steady relationship.

For being a dog, he couldn't consider himself a "good boy" . He was the opposite. He was hardly man's best friend. He was an asshole, and he knew it. Years of being one had finally caught up to him, however.

The gun in his paw was wet with tears dripping down his overly-large snout. He wiped the said salty tears from his face and put the gun in a box. He was going to try and make his last day a meaningful one with his family.

It was a Saturday, which meant everyone would be home.

The day went by quickly, however. It was uneventful, just like the rest of his uneventful life. As the sun went down, so did the rest of the family.

Brian retrieved the last thing he would need, the box with his pistol in it. He looked in the mirror one last time, his eyes were drawn down to the bright red collar around his neck. He unfastened it and removed it. He tip-toed into Stewie's room and left the collar in the crib, next to the sleeping baby. Brian froze to look at him, and smiled. "I love you Stewie, I really do."

Brian left the room and shut the door, but unaware he woke Stewie up in the process. Stewie opened his eyes as the door shut. "What the deuce?" He said, as he followed Brian.

The dog took the box and went outside. He sat down behind the nice tree they have in their backyard. He took the gun out of the box and twirled it around in his paw. He sighed and held it to his head.

A shot rang throughout the street.


	2. Confessions

"God damn it Brian." was the first thing the dog heard as he woke up. Groggy and out of it, he didn't know how to respond. "Why would you try to kill yourself? Don't you understand how much I love you?" Stewie was mumbling to himself, unaware that Brian was now conscious. Brian stayed silent, curious as to what else Stewie would say.

Stewie continued, "I know I treat you like shit a lot, but it's because I'm scared. I don't want you to think any less of me. I know you're not gay and obviously not into two year olds, but I just wish our relationship could work out. But because it can't, I'll be your best friend until the day you die."

Stewie was sitting next to Brian, petting him softly as he spoke. His voice cracked, making it obvious that he was crying. It sounded sincere. Sincere enough to make Brian's heart flutter.

"Who said it can't work?" Brian responded to Stewie's words, shocking the boy in the process. The toddler's eyes widened, "B-Brian!" He wiped his tears away, quickly, trying to make it seem as though he was never crying. "I'm so sorry. How much did you hear?"

"As much as I needed to, Stewie. You really want to be with me? I'm just a stupid mutt, and I'm not going to be alive much longer."

"Don't you dare talk about yourself that way Brian. You know I can expand your life span, we can grow old together. I love you, Brian, and I only want to be with you."

Brian smiled. "I love you too, Stewie".

And with that, they embraced, and shared a beautiful kiss.


	3. Wonderful Sex and Reassuring Thoughts

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Brian feels bad about himself and Stewie is there to reassure him.

That initial kiss led to making out, which led to _sex_. Not that it was a bad thing. They were a couple now. A couple which obviously had to stay on the down low. Brian would probably be euthanized if anyone found out about this. But how careful did they really have to be? The Griffins were completely oblivious to even the most obvious. Stewie had weapons. Him and Brian go on trips for months at a time. They never even noticed.

But back to the sex. Brian was incredibly nervous to be trying anything with Stewie, especially so early in their newfound relationship. Brian has had his fair share of one night stands, but this was different. Stewie was so delicate, and he wanted to be with Brian for a long time after their initial night. Brian was nervous that he wasn't going to be good enough.

They had a talk before anything began. Discussing what each was comfortable with and a safe word, just in case. It was absolutely _incredible_ sex. The best Brian has ever had in his life. Maybe it was because Stewie was his soulmate, or a male, or the type that Brian's never been with before. It could've been a combination, but Brian wasn't sitting around analyzing it all day. At least that's what he told himself, he wasn't very present the next day. He was too busy repeating every moment in his mind.

~~~

The weeks following were amazing. They kissed, cuddled, made out, had more sex. Normal couple things. But it was obvious that Stewie loved him. In his drunken moments, Brian wondered why. He didn't see himself to be worthy of the boy's love. He has worried and angry, lashing out at Stewie about how he shouldn't waste his life on the pathetic dog. He was only, what, 2 years old? That's too early to make so drastic of a decision.

But every time Brain got sad and self-deprecating, Stewie was by his side, reassuring him that Brian was the one he wanted and that he would always love the dog. They were soulmates and meant to be together. This helped Brian a lot.


	4. Unexpected Consequences

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> The aftermath of sex between a dog and a baby is consequential, apparently. Stewie grows sick and Brian tries to figure out what's wrong with him. The answer may shock you.

"I think I need to talk to your parents." Brian spoke, dread in his tone. The baby's eyes widened, "No, I'm fine, I'm fine." He tried to reassure Brian, but could barely finish his sentence before vomiting. He layed his head onto the cold porcelain toilet seat, not even caring how unhygienic it might be. Although he did see Lois cleaning the bathroom that morning before his first bout of nausea hit him. He tried sleeping it off, but to no avail.

"Stewie," Brian's voice was stern yet worried, "You obviously aren't okay. That's the fifth time you've thrown up today, you aren't keeping anything down. Although, maybe I shouldn't talk to your parents, what do they care? Alright come on." He hoisted Stewie up and carried him bridal style out to his car. He carefully buckled Stewie into his booster seat. "Do you want me to go get Rupert?"

Stewie just nodded. You could tell how tired and sick he was just by the look on his face. The dog nodded back and went to fetch Rupert. He also grabbed a bucket on his way out, in case Stewie needed to throw up again.

Brian gave Stewie a soft smile while he pressed the button to turn his car engine on. He was extremely worried about the boy, but wanted to remind him that he was loved and cared for. Stewie weakly smiled back. "I love you Stewie, everything will be okay." He backed out of the driveway and drove to the hospital.

About halfway there, he saw a pregnant woman. He stopped his car and looked to Stewie with wide eyes. "You don't think... is that possible?" Stewie was confused until he followed Brian's eyes and saw the pregnant woman. He put two and two together and looked at Brian. "I mean... I don't think so, but I have done a large number of experiments to myself. One might've had an unexpected, unnoticed side effect. Do you want to get a test and head back home before we go to the hospital. If it's true, I doubt the matter will be taken lightly."

Brian nodded. He did a u-turn and pulled into the grocery store parking lot. He parked and left Stewie in the car with a cup of ginger ale and Rupert.

He placed three packages on the counter, and the cashier gave him a look. "Uh, my girlfriend and I have been pretty busy lately. You know how it is." The dog said with a lying grin on his face. The cashier shrugged and rang up his items. Brian paid and hastily made his way back to the car and drove the two home.

~~~

"Ready to look?" Stewie spoke softly. He was terrified of Brian's reaction. If it was negative, the dog might be sad. If it was positive, the dog might be mad. Stewie mentally hit himself for not testing himself before that passionate night. But how was he to know that he was going to hook up with his crush and have awesome sex.

"Yes." Brian responded. Stewie heard a bit of fear in the way he spoke, which only increased his anxiety. They flipped over the first test. _Positive. _But it could be a false positive, right? Stewie looked at Brian out of the corner of his eye. The dog was visibly nervous. Not sad or angry, just nervous. They flipped the second test. _Positive again. _That has to mean... He hastily flipped the third test. _Positive._

All three tests were positive and they were all different brands and types of tests. Which meant that Stewie was _pregnant._


	5. What To Do Now?

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Brian and Stewie sit down and have a serious conversation.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> CONTENT WARNING: Mentions of Abortion

Stewie was filled with anxiety. He barely noticed the look on Brian's face, as he was too busy panicking.

_What if Brian is going to leave me now? What if he wants an abortion? Do I want an abortion? How do I deal with this? What does a baby of a baby and a dog look like? How does pregnancy work for babies_ _, let alone boy babies? Will I die? Will the baby die? Oh my god what do I do?...._

His thoughts were racing. He didn't even notice that he started shaking and sweating. Brian observed him, concern in his eyes. It was very difficult to read his face at the moment. Stewie had absolutely no idea how the dog felt about all of this.

Brian, seeing and sensing just how nervous Stewie was, picked up the boy and carried him to his bed. "I think I'm going to be sick-" Stewie said. His voice was quiet and hoarse. Brian set him down and grabbed a waste bucket for Stewie to throw up into, which the boy did. It was a mixture of morning sickness and anxiety.

Brian just stroked Stewie's head. He wasn't sure how humans felt about being petted, but he knew it made himself feel good and relax, so he would try doing the same to his lover. He whispered soothing things into the baby's ear, to help relax him.

~~~

Eventually Stewie calmed down a bit. He couldn't cry forever, after all. He looked at Brian, eyes wide and obviously scared for what the dog was thinking. Brian sat up and gave a look that said "are you ready to talk?" Stewie nodded.

"Stewie, I love you very much, and I will support you whether or not you want to keep it. Personally, I would love to have a child with you, but I can understand and respect if you're not ready right now, considering you're so young yourself."

Those words instantly let relief and relaxation wash over Stewie. He was so scared that Brian would leave him because he was an abomination. But maybe that's part of what Brian likes about him. He didn't know.

"I don't know if I'm really ready now, but will I ever be ready? The opportunity has shown itself to us, and I would like to take it. Even if I'm not completely ready, I have you to help me. I want to go through with it, Brian." Stewie spoke. His first words wavering, but by the end he was confident. He was ready to settle down with Brian.

Brian smiled and nodded. They embraced and cuddled and then fell asleep in each other's arms.


	6. Months 1-2

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> The two lovers begin their journey through pregnancy, and the hardships that come with it.

The two lovers decided to get married before their child was born. They held a secret wedding, with Stewie's toys as the guests. They didn't fill out a marriage certificate, as their relationship needed to stay secret for the time being. But they exchanged beautiful vows and even beautiful golden wedding bands. Their bond, while not officially legal, was established and wouldn't be broken. They did their own wedding photos, which actually turned out quite beautiful.

A small bump was already visible on Stewie, as he was still small himself. He couldn't imagine how he'll look at nine months, or however long it would take to gestate a half-human half-dog hybrid.

Stewie was worried. He was scared he wouldn't survive a pregnancy, considering his size. He was also scared that the baby wouldn't survive, as it was gestating inside of a two year old and it was an animal-human hybrid. There wasn't much he could do about any of it, he would just have to let nature take it's course and cross those bridges as they come.

He still had morning sickness, he could barely keep anything down for the first two months. It was miserable, and he had to inject himself with different things just to make sure he was getting the nutrients that he and the baby needed.

Brian was very worried about the safety of both him and the fetus. He was by Stewie's side 24/7. The family asked questions, but Brian just gave them fake excuses, which seemed to satisfy them.

They spent every night together, cuddling. Brian's paw would automatically wrap around Stewie's abdomen, but not too tight.


	7. Month 3

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Sweet morning kisses and midnight whispers.

Stewie was entering the 3rd month of his pregnancy. His bump was quite prominent, similar to how a six month pregnant adult woman would look like.

The morning sickness ceased as well, making way for a new part of pregnancy, _the cravings. _Stewie would be craving strange things. _Dog food, red meat, pickles, and chocolate _just to name a few. He assumed the dog food and red meat came from the dog part of his pregnancy. Brian would make fun of him for the dog food, but Stewie didn't mind.

~~~

One night, anxiety overtook Brian. He was very scared for his husband's safety. He didn't want to lose both his husband and their unborn child. If he had to choose, he would choose Stewie. He brought abortion back up, much to Stewie's dismay.

"I want to have a baby with you, but we should wait until you're older and less likely to have complications." He said to Stewie.

Stewie frowned, "But, Brian, I'll be okay-"

"YOU DON'T KNOW THAT!" Brian yelled, his voice wavering as tears filled his eyes. "I'm just a stupid mutt and I might have given you a death sentence before your life has really even begun. I can't lose you, and I would much rather have you around forever than some stupid hybrid who's going to be a failure just like his father. I can't do a single fucking thing right, I just ruin everyone's lives. You should have let me die that day instead of saving me. If you die because I stupidly and selfishly impregnated you, I could never live with myself. I'd rather die in your place. You should just abort the abomination, divorce me, and find a better human to be with, then let me die in a year which is pretty much all the time I have left." He was rambling on and on while sobbing.

Stewie looked away for a moment, to contemplate what to say to the dog. He was right, Stewie didn't know if he was going to survive the pregnancy. But he swore to himself in that moment that he would do everything in his power to keep both himself and the baby alive.

"Brian." Stewie spoke softly, returning his gaze back to his husband. "Although I can't guarantee, I'm going to do everything in my power to make sure that both the baby and I live, okay?"

Brian nodded a little, but was still crying. "And, you aren't a stupid mutt, and you won't die within a year. I'm going to lengthen your lifespan so we can grow old together, okay?"

The dog smiled a little and nodded. The two cuddled and fell asleep in each other's arms.


	8. Disaster Strikes

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Stewie wakes up a bloody mess and is scared for his life.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> TW: MENTIONS OF MISCARRIAGE!

Stewie woke up to Brian shaking him. His vision was blurry and mind hazy. He couldn't think straight at all. Brian was yelling but Stewie's ears were ringing and he couldn't hear the dog. He looked around and tried to examine his situation but couldn't see much. But what he could see concerned him greatly.

** _Blood._ **

It was everywhere, all over the sheets. _So that's why he couldn't think straight. He's lost a lot of blood._

Luckily for him, he prepared for a similar situation a long time ago when he was still malicious.

"B-Brian..." His voice was weak, but the dog could still hear him. The sound of Stewie made him shut up and listen carefully. "I need you to get my blood bag out of my weapons closet." His speech was very slurred, so he didn't know how much the dog understood. At the mention of his weapons closet, Brian rushed over and pulled down a baseball bat, which was actually a lever. He entered a combination into the control panel that became visible.

A secret door opened, dust and steam billowing out. Brian coughed but went inside, looking for something that could be of use to him. He noticed a medical box and opened it, revealing a bag of blood hooked up to an IV that was ready to be inserted. Brian grabbed the bag and read the label. _Stewie's Blood (Only to be used for Stewie)._

_Perfect._

Brian brought the bag over, placing it onto a coat hanger. He took the needle and carefully inserted it into one of Stewie's veins. Stewie flinched at the prick, but stayed still to let the blood flow.

After the bag was emptied, Stewie felt much better. He removed the IV and stripped naked, to examine himself. Brian blushed a little at the sudden nudity, but stayed silent, letting his husband do what he needed to do.

The blood came from Stewie's anus, where he assumed he would give birth from. There was almost miscarriage levels of blood, which was exactly what Stewie was worried about. He asked Brian to leave the room so he could run tests on himself. Brian hesitantly complied.

~~~

Brian was pacing in front of Stewie's door, to the point where he a wore a very small groove into the floor. He was extremely worried about his husband and their child. After a moment, Stewie let him back in.

"Well?.." Brian asked, he was talking about the results.

"It was a very scary sight, but luckily everything's alright." Stewie said. Brian sighed a sigh of relief. "What happened was, my pseudowomb was shifting and creating a birth canal through my anus. It made a few changes to my anatomy that caused bleeding. Everything should be okay."

Brian decided against asking exactly how his anatomy changed, and instead just embraced the boy. "I'm so happy everything is okay. I was so worried."

Brian then kissed Stewie and they worked on cleaning up all the blood.


	9. Months 4-5

Stewie was _huge. _Considering he was really only a baby himself, it was hard for his body to carry another baby. He was in pain pretty much nonstop. Pain in his abdomen from how stretched it is. Pain in his back and feet for having to support so much weight. His head hurt often, and everything hurt from being pushed on from the baby. It didn't help that the baby was starting to kick and squirm a lot.

Stewie had to pee a lot and couldn't sleep well. His clothes barely fit him anymore. He was lucky his family was so oblivious to everything, because his baby bump was almost as big as him. He wondered how much longer he would be pregnant for, since he long passed the dog gestational period. He figured it wouldn't be much longer until he popped.

And then his thoughts were confirmed with excruciating pain and the sound of water hitting the ground. He was now in labor.


	10. Birth of a Child

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Childbirth!  
Don't read if you don't want graphic imagery. This chapter is skipable.

_Holy shit. Holy shit! **Holy shit!!**_

Brian paced back and forth, not knowing what to do for his husband. He was panicking and afraid. He could lose both his husband and child if this were to have complications. He tried not to think about but failed, for he was so anxious. His anxiety levels rised as Stewie started crying. _Stewie never cries. _

"Are you okay? Is something wrong?" The dog said, panic in his voice. He took his lover's hand in his paw.

Stewie clenched his teeth and squeezed Brian's paw as he had a contraction. After it was over, he let out a breath he didn't realize he was holding.

"I'm okay, it's just very painful. Celebrities make this look easy."

"Well it's gotta be more painful for you because you're a baby, a boy and the kid is half dog." Brian said, trying to be sympathetic but ending up just annoying the boy.

Stewie rolled his eyes and tensed as another contraction came on. "They're only a minute apart, The baby will be out soon."

This raised Brian's anxiety but he tried to be strong for his husband.

"Can you take my pants off please?" Brian blushed at the request but it's not like he hasn't seen the child naked before. He took the pants off and looked. His anus was wide and he could just start to see the head.

"I see it!" Brian exclaimed. Stewie nodded and started pushing at the next contraction, clenching his bedsheets.

Fluid poured out onto the bed as the baby's head neared the exit.

"One more push and it'll be crowning." Brian said, and reached his paw out so his husband could squeeze it. And squeezed he did.

Stewie felt a burning pain as the child's head pushed against his hole, but he kept pushing. Soon the ears came out, they looked like dog ears with human skin. The next part was the snout. Stewie didn't know how the snout was going to fit but he trusted his body.

He stood up and squatted, as bearing down might help. He soon realized this was a bad idea, as he couldn't support the weight of his stomach. He layed back down and re-spread his legs. Another contraction came on and he pushed with all his might. Nothing was happening though, and he was scared. The child might get stuck and they might both die.

He shook the thought out of his head and pushed again, screaming in agony as the snout passed through. Blood and fluids followed suit. Stewie relaxed and tried to breathe. One more big push and the child would be out.

He took a deep breath and pushed. _Hard._ The shoulders came out and the rest of the body slid out, with more blood and fluids trailing behind.

_**"It's a boy!" **_Brian shouted with joy.


	11. Finn Griffin

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> if you wanna know what the baby looks like, it's the one named finn in the episode where stewie gets pregnant.

Stewie reached his arms out, asking for his child to be given to him. Brian complied and gave their soon to his "mother".

Stewie's newly formed breasts became swollen and sore, so he brought the baby's mouth to his nipple. The newborn drank excitedly.

"What should we name him?" Brian asked his husband.

"Finn." Stewie replied confidently and Brian nodded. They both looked down at their son and smiled, then shared a kiss.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> the next chapter will be the epilogue


	12. Epilogue

Stewie smiled and opened his arms wide. His 5 year old son ran into his arms.

Lois and Peter thought this dog was a hairless dog who was the son of Brian from a female dog. That's what they'll always think.

"Hi Papa!" Finn said and gave his birth dad sloppy doggy kisses.

"Hi baby, how was obedience school today?" Stewie smiled. He knew his son didn't need real schooling as he was a genius like himself, but he was enrolled in obedience school to connect him with his dog heritage.

"Really great! Cocoa and I became best friends today!!" Finn exclaimed with a wagging tail.

Brian walked into the room and gave his boy a hug. Brian smiled at his husband, who was now slightly tallee than him, and his boy, who was up to his chin.

Their family waa perfect. Brian couldn't believe he almost took his own life six years ago, he wouldn't have had such a perfect little family.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> thank you all for reading this story! i have decided to orphan this work as the nature of it can reflect onto me.


End file.
